As is typical many times when I write, this post took a different twist then I expected. I initially sat to write about a couple of experiences from my childhood but when I started typing, something entirely different came from my fingers. And so I am writing this beginning paragraph last.
Last week I made the trek to the store with all nine children in tow. That rarely happens nowadays as most of the time the older girls stay home to watch the younger children while I only take one or two with me for some mommy attention. As it was a ‘good’ day, meaning all of the children were behaving, it was quite an enjoyable trip to boot.
In the course of traipsing about the store I inevitably was asked, “Are they all yours?” followed by, “My, you are brave.” It was that comment that really resonated with me.
Why would she say I was brave?
Was it that I had so many children?
Or that I took them ALL to the store with me at once?
Yes, it would appear that a sight like our family can be rare indeed. Is that what prompted the comment?
Or on a deeper level….(these are the questions that kept me up that night)
Am I brave because I dare to show where children rank in my life in this world of “me?”
Am I brave because I just try to follow God’s plan for my life, which for me means having a lot of children, by answering His call as Mary did, “be it unto me according to thy word?”
Am I brave because I chose to have children in the first place? And raise them as Pres. Boyd K Packer stated “in enemy territory?”
Is it brave to welcome another little soul into my life, to risk my heart being ripped and broken by – an illness, an accident, or choices that might be made down the road of life?
Motherhood is a daily show of bravery.
The bravery of swallowing pride and admitting you were wrong. Of teaching children even mothers make mistakes and are in need of Christ’s healing grace.
It is helping to strap on the armor of God, that our children may fight the battles that will come to them, while you watch them grow to adulthood and question yourself, “Have I done enough?” type of bravery.
It is finding the beautiful in the most mundane of tasks because beauty is in the eye-of-the-beholder bravery.
It is back breaking, knee bending, tears streaming bravery.
Join us for Wordfull Wednesday! Write a post about a time you were brave. Did you have to face a phobia, speak in front of a lot of people, lock up the dog on a moonless night? We want to know! Come back here and link up to your post. All participants are automatically entered for the October Wordfull Wednesday giveaway (the prize is always a surprise but is guaranteed something good from Etsy!). The odds are excellent right now, only three entries from last Wordfull Weednesday.
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yes to all the above. it is brave. and sometimes I doubt myself (and my ability to afford) lots of kids. Just the other day I saw a mum at the shops with 8 children. I laughed to myself because I rarely see a parent shopping with more kids than I have (only 4 but thats a big number in australia). It was nice to see. Either there arent that many big families here OR the mothers are wise enough to shop alone or only with a few of them.
I always think of you as an amazing example.. I honestly dont know how I would have that many kids and you sometimes make me rethink.
thanks, I needed that tonight. 🙂
This was an incredible post, Montserrat. Thank you so much for this. It’s an eye-opener, for sure, but I can’t wait to be a mom.
I get that comment all the time (and I only have 4 kids that I am taking around with me). It is strange that they use that term “brave”. I guess we Moms are brave as you so elegantly explained. Thanks for sharing your thoughts it has left me with lots to ponder!
I get that a lot too, and I only have 4…. {4 boys} I don’t think I’m brave for having them, {I guess… I think the boys are brave for letting me be their mom :)}
thank you for your post.
My mother used to take all 9 of us (# 10 came later) to the grocery store at once and we thought it was great, but I’m sure my mom got the occasional comment too. I think she was brave to take us all because of the difficulty of managing us all as well as the fact that she was making a statement!
So, I’m a dork and don’t know how to link up with my post, but I thought I’d try it out this week and my post is here: Hollythehomemaker.blogspot.com
Your comments are what I have felt for a long time. Going to town, for us involves at least two hours of driving time not counting shopping time. I am blessed with seven children and premature graying hair. So ironically what used to be (just two years ago) the “Oh my how brave you are!” comments now I get the “Are these your grandchildren?” comments. I get the opportunity to say with a smile “No they are all mine.” Quite regularly they give a questioning look, so I tell them we started late in life:) I guess 20 is a late enough start;)
I have wondered often about the “Brave” comment. At times it is said with an irreverant tone. I have wondered if they were thinking something else and not “brave” enough to say it. Then I am amazed at how bold they are. At times it stings but how sad for them that they do not see the joy that family brings regardless of size.
I see that I went somewhere similar with my thoughts today. (sort of) It is so very interesting how very different some versions of brave are.
I often feel brave for very little things I have done and if I mentioned it would be mocked (or looked at strangely!) for my little tiny bit of bravery.
BUT things I take as simple or just something I do, often get the comments of bravery.
Interesting and thought provoking. Thank you so much for bringing WW back. I always get so much out of it, both from others and as I think about topics.
Love the testament. I have also been told I was brave for having four. Just four. I think the brave is waking each day, not knowing where the motherhood will take you. Will you be battling illness? Solving chemistry equations? Explaining puberty? Standing firm with that dreaded NO word? Brave is heading into the everyday armed only with your faith and the knowledge that your love for them will guide your decisions and answers.
That was absolutely heartwarming!
I am so glad that you shared this. I am also so glad Wordfull Wednesday is back. I kind of wrote about this topic and didn’t even realize it today…I think you are amazing and yes you are brave for all of those reasons. I loved Boyd K. Packers talk at Conference. It was in my top 3 favorites category.
bravery might play into it 😉
Shopping with nine is crazy (I know from experience).
love you, great post!
I had my first son when I was 22. (Not by any means early in the Mormon community.) And I thought I was doing what everyone desired and everyone believed was right. I didn’t know it was bravery until after the fact. Being the youngest mom at playgroup, feeling overwhelmed (with 3) at the grocery store, and most importantly–wondering before my Heavenly Father if the job I am doing as a young, inexperienced, imperfect mom is anywhere near an acceptable offering–You’re right it’s all bravery.
I love this! Beautiful writing and very true words. Thank you for the uplift. I like the word “brave” as it applies to my work. It will help me to think of it that way when I’m having those very hard moments that seem to come every single day.
Beautiful post! By the way, I am not brave enough to take my three small children to the grocery store by myself. I go a little berserk!
Cool post…love that shot of you…Brave Mama!
I don’t have a post to link up to, because I’m afraid to write a post. I just lost my son (stillborn at 34 weeks) and everyone keeps telling me how brave I am. I don’t feel brave for how I’m holding up (or not holding up), but I do feel brave in deciding to keep going. To try again. I want to have more children, but I’m incredibly scared. But I feel brave enough to try again…
I have 6 children and I used to get that comment all the time. I really wanted to write an entry, but it looks like you have to have a blog in order to do that. Rats!
LOVE this post! SO true! Thank you.
Great post!
I just wrote a post involving me taking a leap of faith, being brave to follow something new that my husband wanted to try. I didn’t write it with linking to here in mind, so I don’t think I ever used the word Brave! But I think it fits the “bravery” topic.
http://pursuinghealthyliving.blogspot.com/2011/10/best-kept-secret-for-reverent-sacrament.html